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09 SettingGoals andManaging Expectations inMentoring For a mentoring relationship to be effective, it is essential to define from the beginning what goals both parties want to achieve and to establish clear expectations. Mentor and mentee need to be “aligned” on the purpose of their meetings, the type of support to be offered, and the boundaries of the relationship. This helps avoid misunderstandings and gives direction to the process, making it easier to track progress over time. Below are key guidelines for setting goals and managing expectations: Define realistic and achievable goals: At the start of the mentoring process, mentor and mentee should talk about what they hope to achieve through the relationship. Is it to improve school performance? Get career guidance? Develop social skills? Once needs are identified, they can work together to define specific goals. It's helpful to use the SMART framework (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time- bound). For example: “raise my math grade by one point this semester” or “ask three questions in class this month.” Setting clear goals provides a roadmap for the sessions and a way to evaluate progress. Clarify roles and mutual expectations: Early on, it's important to discuss what each person expects from the relationship. The mentor should explain the kind of support they can offer (e.g., “I can help you with study strategies and introduce you to people, but I won’t do your homework”) and be transparent about their availability. In turn, the mentee should express their expectations (e.g., “I’d like help planning my academic future”). It's essential to agree on boundaries: how far the mentor’s help goes and what responsibilities the mentee maintains. This clarity builds trust and prevents frustration. For example, they might agree on how often to meet, how confidentiality will be handled, and that both parties commit to being punctual and honest. Focus on the process, not just the results: A common mistake is to create rigid expectations for success (e.g., “my mentor will get me into university no matter what”). It's important to understand that mentoring offers guidance and support, but the effort and decisions belong to the mentee. Instead of promising guaranteed outcomes, it’s better to focus on steady progress: every small improvement matters (like “turning in more homework on time” or “attending class regularly”), and these can be stepping stones toward bigger goals. Celebrating these smaller wins helps maintain motivation and avoids setting unrealistic expectations. Introduction to Intergenerational Social Mentoring